Without Exception Newsletter

The work we do in this ministry is work we do in solidarity with those who came before us. I am profoundly thankful for the blessing it was to know Deacon Ray and Betty, both of whom supported Without Exception from the beginning.

Please click on the pictures below to read their obituaries.

Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord,

and let perpetual light shine upon them.

May they rest in peace.

Francis, The Comic Strip is created by Pat Marrin for the National Catholic Reporter. This comic appeared on February 18, 2025.

This section is an open forum for members to share reflections or responses connected to our mission.

🚩Please respect the privacy of the authors. These reflections are intended only for the private forum of our network. Public sharing or reprinting is not permitted.

A sense of impending evil may lie in wait at the door, tempting us with feelings of fear, sadness, and anger. Those passions are strong and pervasive in these times. But faith in Jesus Christ is a powerful reminder that we can do hard things, endure the agony in the garden, suffer the Crucifixion, and yet still hope in the Resurrection. Good Friday was only a day; Easter is forever.

It is important for us not to give into despair during these times of suffering. For young persons (for all persons?), pastoral ministers are an opening to relationships of virtue. So at a time when it seems easier and safer for LGBTQ+ persons to stay in the darkness of the closet, we have to live as "little lamps of the Gospel" guiding God's beloved children towards safety and acceptance.

Pope Francis said in a 2018 homily, "The imagery of a lighthouse resonates with the Church's mission to be a source of hope and guidance, particularly for those who feel lost or abandoned. It underscores the need for communities to open their hearts and homes, fostering an environment where all can feel welcomed and valued, much like a lighthouse that stands firm against the storm, offering direction and safety to those navigating turbulent waters."

In their 2022 book When Children Come Out, Drs. Mark Yarhouse and Olya Zaporozhets wrote that only about 50% of parents suspect their child is gay before they come out. Sadly, the most difficulty with this news is experienced by conservative Christian families, who feel caught between their faith and their child. About 40% of these families end up leaving their church because of interpersonal rejection. No matter what, the authors encourage parents to unlock any doors and "maintain and invest in every possible avenue for future relationship" with their child. This is what it looks like to be "little lamps of the Gospel."

The entry below is a window into the importance of these strong parent-child relationships. Mark's knowledge that his parents loved him unconditionally made it easier for him to come out. During the time of 1998, his parents' primary concern was protecting his physical and emotional safety, and they soon worked tirelessly to help the local church overcome negative attitudes about gay persons. But it all started with the a home that was nurturing and supportive. Indeed, this is the value of opening our hearts and homes to our children, which by extension can also influence our schools and churches to grow communities of belonging for all of God's beloved children.

Dear Mom,

This is something I've wanted to tell you and dad for a while but couldn't. I'm gay. Understand that I firmly understand that this is what I truly am. I wish I could have told you in person but I just couldn't. Please don't be upset with me, trust me when I say its something I can't change, and don't want to change. I love you, know that! I've been gay for as long as I've known and have always loved you and you, me. Nothing changes. I'll talk with you this evening.

Love Always,

Mark

The following is an official response from the USCCB Office of the General Secretary to my letter addressing the USCCB Statement on Executive Orders Signed by the President. While it may seem small, this is a significant private acknowledgement.

Thank you for your letter of January 24, 2025. The three Archbishops have asked that this office acknowledge the letter and the sincerity of the message. This bishops of the United States, individually and collectively, take very seriously the delicate tensions always being called for in matters of accurate teaching and the dignity of all persons.

Thank you for your thoughts. Be assured that we continue to strive for the balance referenced above.

I was just recalling how I had you as a teacher in high school around 1999 or so. You had us watch the movie Philadelphia and told us that gay people existed and suggested we give them respect. We didn’t have to be so hard on them. I came out of the closet two years later and I often have thought over the past 25 years about how important it was that someone said something that wasn’t completely negative about gay people during that fragile moment in my youth when I was afraid to say who I was. I don’t know what the Catholic Church’s stance is these days, but, damn, it was hard to be closeted and gay back then!

In 2019, Cardinal Wilton Gregory addressed a transgender individual and said: "You belong to the heart of this Church. And there is nothing that you may do, may say, that will ever rip you from the heart of this Church ... We have to find a way to talk to one another ... I think that’s the way that Jesus ministered. He engaged people, he took them where they were at, and He invited them to go deeper, closer to God. So if you’re asking me where do you fit? You fit in the family."

The Church isn't exactly renowned for making everyone feel like they belong and fit in, but there is always more we can do, even at a parish level. Last year, we launched a support ministry for those who are, or who have relatives or friends who are, members of the LGBT community. We found that, while we can't provide everything everyone was looking for, we can provide something even more important: community and understanding, where shared experiences and mutual support help make us better disciples. As we prepare to reconnect, we welcome those who might benefit from such a group, where we reflect on scripture, share some of the things that have helped us on our journey and the things that still challenge us, and remind each other that God has given us gifts that He expects us to use to build His Kingdom and benefit the common good.

God never meant for anyone to be left alone and figure it all out on their own. And He never meant for anyone to choose between their child and their faith. These are the building blocks of our LGBT Support Ministry. Join us on our journey back to the heart of the Church where we all belong ...

We will welcome you regardless of your situation in life, whether you are single, married, divorced or widowed, whatever the state of your marriage, including those in a mixed faith marriage, and those sharing a home without marriage. We will welcome you whether you are conservative or liberal, old or young, rich or poor, gay, lesbian, transgender, non-binary, or straight. You belong here whatever your race, color and cultural background, immigrant or native born, whether you are fully or differently abled, healthy or sick. We will welcome you whether you are struggling with your faith or firm in your commitment. We will maintain an open door and an open heart to you and offer you a place to share in the life of the parish and grow in relationship with Jesus Christ.

Know anybody in the Boston area? On Monday, March 17 from 7:00 - 9:00 PM Without Exception will host Eve Tushnet, author of Gay and Catholic and co-founder of Building Catholic Futures, for a presentation and conversation on "Why Catholic Schools Keep Fighting Over LGBT Questions."

Specifically designed for Catholic high school personnel, this event will begin by exploring the conflicts among stakeholders in Catholic education. Eve will then identify four starting points, or "lenses" we bring to these conversations, each of which have characteristic insights and weaknesses. Conflict happens when people seek to impose one lens and reject another; conflict can be transformed when we acknowledge some truth in another person's lens. Eve will present work based on interviews with Catholic school teachers, administrators, alumni, and parents—all people of goodwill, but with very different starting points. We will end with plenty of time for open questions and conversation with David and Eve.

For LGBTQ+ young persons an affirming symbol can be a lifeline. It communicates "you are precious in my eyes and honored, and I love you" (Isaiah 43:4). The gesture is small, but it increases a young person's sense of value and supports their physical, mental, and spiritual health.

In some places rainbow colors are controversial and beyond the threshold for administrators. That is why the Without Exception logo is designed to be an integrated Catholic symbol. The circle represents the universal (catholic) call to be witnesses to the gospel in all places, “to the ends of the earth” (Acts 1:8); in all times, as symbolized by the colors of the liturgical year; and to all people, as we “look upon our neighbor (without any exception) as another self” (CCC 1931). The heart at the center of the logo is an interpretation of the Sacred Heart of Jesus, and the colors of the liturgical year symbolize glory (gold); Mary and water (blue); blood and fire (red); penance and preparation (purple); life and hope (green); and joy (rose).

After a couple of delivery issues in the previous months, these items are now available at cost plus $6.00 shipping. This will upgrade the reliability of delivery. Payment can be made by Venmo.

• Building Catholic Futures (BCF) is launching a Meet the Witness Webinar Series on Wednesday, March 5 at 7pm Eastern/4pm Pacific time. The first witness is Nate Tinner-Williams, the co-founder and editor of Black Catholic Messenger, which offers news and commentary relevant to African-American Catholics. Nate’s story includes an early fascination with sacred Scripture, in all its wildness (give it up for the horse-sized locusts with human faces!). He journeyed through multiple Christian traditions before God called him into the Catholic Church. Eve Tushnet will interview him about his journey, his work with BCF as a speaker, his help adapting BCF Journeys evangelization content, the parallels he sees between Black Catholic and queer Catholic experience, and his hopes and questions for Catholics who seek a better future. Those who attend the webinar will have a chance to submit questions anonymously. Register here for free.

• Read more about Jory Mertens in this new article from the Episcopal Diocese of West Missouri! Jory is a Carthage, Missouri-based artist who works in digital fine art and illustration, often using cubist, geometric, and fauvist elements (ArtByJory). Many of his works are based on his view of Jesus as being radically inclusive. He enjoys creating works based on his family, theology, nature, and portraits of heroes of humanity. As a special gift for our community Jory offers a 30% discount on ALL his artwork with discount code WITHOUTEXCEPTION30.

• Rooted in Ignatian values of cura personalis and accompaniment, Camino is an opportunity for religious communities, parish and school staffs, or other Catholic organizations to encounter the journeys of Catholic trans people through our common faith. The presenters include trans Catholics and parents of trans children. The hope is to foster more welcoming environments by sharing the real life and faith experiences of trans Catholics. The sessions can be scheduled by appointment on Zoom. Email Michael Sennett at caminoencounter@gmail.com for more information.

• Bit of Joy is a support group for ministry leaders in LGBTQ+ Catholic ministry. The group meets on Zoom on the third Monday of each month from 7:30-9:00 PM Eastern time. Every session is facilitated by a different group member, who gets to choose the topic for conversation. If you are a ministry leader interested in peer support in these times, then please contact Vicki Sheridan at thewelcometablepgh@gmail.com.

• Fortunate and Faithful Families of Atlanta will host their yearly retreat entitled “A Home For ALL” at the Archdiocese of Atlanta Chancery, 2401 Lake Park Dr., Smyrna, GA 30080 on Sunday, March 9 from noon until 7pm. The keynote talk will be given by nationally recognized speaker, Catholic lay minister, and attorney Yunuen Trujillo, author of LGBTQ Catholics: A Guide to Inclusive Ministry. The day will also include small group sharing, spiritual reflection, Mass, and dinner. All LGBTQ persons, parents and family members, clergy, allies and those desiring a more welcoming church for all are invited to attend. Registration deadline is March 3. Go to fortunatefaithfulfamilies.org to register.

• The LGBTQ+ Initiative of the Marianist Social Justice Collaborative is sponsoring a treat June 6-8, 2025 at the Bellarmine Jesuit Retreat House near Chicago. Registration is now open for this event. You may access more detailed information at this link.

• Outreach will host a three-day guided retreat, led by James Martin, S.J., at Daylesford Abbey in Paoli, PA, outside of Philadelphia, from June 20-22, 2025. The retreat, “Jesus Desires your Friendship,” is designed for LGBTQ Catholics, their families and friends and those who minister to them. During this silent, preached retreat, Father Martin will offer several talks on the theme of how Jesus reaches out to those on the “margins,” but also invites us to create a community, overcoming the barriers of “us” and “them.” There will be opportunities for faith sharing in smaller groups as well as Masses celebrated on Saturday and Sunday. Space is limited and registration is available on a first-come, first-served basis. To learn more, and to register, visit the website of Daylesford Abbey, a Norbertine abbey located on several acres of beautiful countryside.

• The Naming Project will hold its summer camp July 20-25, 2025 in Minnesota. The theme this year is Beautiful Things. From enjoying the beauty of creation, to arts & crafts exploring beauty and wonder, to music and songs that help us enjoy each other’s company and talents, and so much more, this summer will be a time to discover just how beautiful this world can truly be, and how God has made us all uniquely beautiful as part of this beautiful creation! We will take time in Bible study to explore how beautiful God declared creation to be, and how everyone is a part of all things wonderful even when we can’t always see it ourselves! Even when we don’t see it and can’t feel it, there is so much joy, beauty, and wonder all around us, and we plan to spend our amazing summer exploring it! Campers will experience large and small group conversation, personal quiet time as well as campfires, crafts, swimming, games, and summer camp fun in the beauty of God’s creation! Find more information at The Naming Project.

Becquart, Nathalie. Sr. Nathalie Becquart: Synodality as a path towards greater inclusion. Outreach, February 10, 2025.

Callaghan, Tonya. Homophobia in the Hallways: Heterosexism and Transphobia in Canadian Catholic Schools. University of Toronto Press, 2018.

Fisher, Jefferson. The Next Conversation: Argue Less, Talk More. TarcherPerigee, 2025.

Francis. Angelus, Sunday, 28 February 2021. The Holy See, February 28, 2021.

Francis. Homily for 2018 World Day of Migrants and Refugees. The Holy See, January 14, 2018.

Hays, Christopher and Richard Hays. The Widening of God's Mercy: Sexuality Within the Biblical Story. Yale University Press, 2024.

Herriot, Lindsay and Tonya Callaghan. Possibilities for Trans-Affirming Policy Potential: A Case Study of a Canadian Catholic School. Journal of Catholic Education, Vol. 22, Is. 3, 2019.

Hui-Anderson, Alyssa. How Empathetic Are You? New Study Shows Trait Is Rising Among Young Americans. Health, September 9, 2024.

Jones, Jeffrey. LGBTQ+ Identification in U.S. Rises to 9.3%. Gallup, February 20, 2025.

Kerper, Michael. What is and isn't a heresy? Parable Magazine, Diocese of Manchester, NH, September/October 2013.

Koutsoufis, Danielle. A transgender Catholic’s advice for LGBTQ people in tough times. Outreach, February 18, 2025.

Meyer, Ilan and Andrew Flores. Anti-LGBT Victimization in the United States: Results from the National Crime Victimization Survey (2022-2023). The Williams Institute, UCLA School of Law, February 2025.

Ortner, Michael and Kimberly Begg. The Catholic School Playbook. Word on Fire, 2025.

Redfield, Alana. Impact of Ban on Gender-Affirming Care on Transgender Minors. Williams Institute, UCLA School of Law, January 2025.

Tushnet, Eve. Gay and Catholic. Ave Maria Press, 2014.

Tushnet, Eve. Tenderness: A Gay Christian’s Guide to Unlearning Rejection and Experiencing God’s Extravagant Love. Ave Maria Press, 2021.

Wimmer, AC. Vatican Doctrine Chief Warns Against ‘Claim to Omnipotence’ of Gender Ideology. National Catholic Register, February 18, 2025.

White, Timothy. How My Dad Reconciled His God and His Gay Son. New York Times, February 6, 2025.

Wyttenbach, Melodie and Anne-Marie Grejdus. Fostering Integral Human Development: A Catholic Perspective on Whole Child Education. International Catholic Journal of Education, No. 10, 2024.

Wyttenbach, Melodie, Molly McMahon, John Reyes, Michael Boyle, Katie Ward, and Victoria Berges. The Playbook for Whole-Child Education in U.S. Catholic Schools. National Catholic Educational Association, 2025.

Yarhouse, Mark and Olya Zaporozhets. When Children Come Out: A Guide for Christian Parents. InterVarsity Press, 2022.

• Pilgrims of Hope: An Interfaith Virtual Morning of Reflection for LGBTQ+ Persons, their Families, and Allies will be held on Zoom on March 29, 2025 from 7:00 - 9:00 AM Pacific, 8:00 – 9:00 AM Mountain, 9:00 – 11:00 AM Central, 10:00 AM – 12:00 PM Eastern. Presenters are Fr. Emile "Buddy" Noel, Sr. Rochelle Perrier, MSC, and Brad Leger. For those of us who are members of the LGBTQ+ community and our loved ones who are living through these challenging times: How do we keep a sense of hope, remembering that life has not forgotten us? How do we move together as a Pilgrim People, embracing loving kindness and compassion, and taking action based on hope? Please join us for a morning of prayer, reflection, sharing, and community building as we walk together as beloved Pilgrim People. While there is no cost to be take part in this gathering, you must be registered in order to attend. Deadline for registration is March 27. You may register at this link. Upon clicking the registration link, some of you may receive a message from Google in which you need to request access to Google Forms before you can complete the registration process. Please respond to this request and then you will receive a message to allow access. Then, you should be able to complete the registration process. This is just an added layer of security from Google. Our apologies for any confusion or inconvenience. If you have any questions or problems, please contact Brad at brad@balconsulting.org. He will be able to manually add you to the registration list.

• The annual Interfaith Weekend Retreat for LGBTQ+ Persons, Allies, and Family Members will be held on the weekend of November 7-9, 2025 at the Feliciana Retreat and Conference Center in Norwood, Louisiana. More information will be forthcoming. If you have any questions, then please contract Brad Leger at brad@balconsulting.org.

• Dr. Julia Sadusky, Psy.D recently started a mailing list to share updates and resources to help better understand the intersection of faith, sexuality, and gender. Additionally, she will continue offering 2-hour virtual consultations to individuals and families across the country navigating questions around sexuality, gender, and Christian faith. Also, a major goal of 2025 is making low-cost resources (especially video content) readily accessible to individuals and families. A primary avenue for this will be her professional YouTube channel. Finally, while making this content is costly, it's an important aspect of Dr. Sadusky's ongoing work. If you would like to support this project, consider joining her Patreon community, where an online group of Christians is seeking to elevate the conversations around gender, sexuality, and faith. It also gives members access to exclusive video content, while creating a way for viewers to financially support the creation of new content moving forward. Please contact admin@luxcc.org with any questions.

February 2025

January 2025

December 2024

November 2024

October 2024

September 2024

Without Exception is a no-cost ministry network for people in Catholic secondary education and related fields of ministry. The goal is to offer helpful networking and resources to accompany our LGBTQ+ students and colleagues with the love of Jesus Christ and his church. Please respect privacy and confidentiality concerning the persons and schools connected to our network. The strength of this work is sustained by the trust among members.

Without Exception is a global network of Catholic secondary educators dedicated to discerning the art of accompaniment for LGBTQ+ students in Catholic schools. Through a commitment to faithful dialogue and peer collaboration, we seek to understand what it means to share the love of Jesus Christ with every person, without exception.

Email: info@withoutexception.net

Website: www.withoutexception.net