Teasing, bullying and conflict are words often used interchangeably, but involve three distinctly different types of interactions. Understanding the specific behaviors involved can help parents and guardians coach kids on the best way to respond. So, what’s the difference?
Teasing can consist of neutral, friendly, playful words and actions but also can be negative, annoying, or hurtful. Teasing is often intended to get attention or provoke a reaction. Strategies such as under-reacting or ignoring often put an end to teasing, but children should be encouraged to seek help from an adult if those strategies aren’t effective. When teasing becomes hostile behavior intended to exert power over another person, it can escalate to bullying.
Conflicts are arguments, disagreements, or fights between people and a normal part of human relationships. While conflicts may involve verbal name calling or physical aggression, a one-time event of two children fighting with no perceived power imbalance is not an example of bullying.
Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior that is intentional, persistent, severe, pervasive, and involves a social or physical power imbalance between the person doing the bullying and the target.
The four types of bullying are verbal (using mean words to hurt or intimidate); physical (harming a person’s body or possessions); social (intended to hurt someone’s social relationships or reputation); and cyber (harming others over a device). Children who experience or witness bullying at school are encouraged to stand up to bullying and report it, but parents and guardians should contact the school immediately if bullying occurs. Bullying is serious behavior that cannot be ignored and rarely stops without adult intervention.
