The LAND Line

I'm your new school counselor, Cari Land! Every week, I'll post here with my upcoming lessons, important reminders, & helpful resources. This first issue is like a backpack full of info and emotions…Finding words feels like getting ready for that first day of school, creating order out of chaos. Plus, I'm sorting through all the feelings of being new on campus, just like you may be right now.

Dr Becky Kennedy, author of ‘Good Inside’, wrote ‘two things can be true.’

For students, that might sound like:

"I can be brave AND feel nervous the first day of school."

"I can wish I had a few more days of Summer AND cannot wait to get back in the routine."

"I am a wild Maplewood Mustang AND a calm Peacemaker."

For grown-ups, that might sound like:

"I know my child is ready AND it's so hard to let go."

"I can worry about the 'what ifs' AND trust my child to do hard things."

"I can feel confident about my parenting AND wonder if I'm doing it right."

Despite 25 years as a school counselor and 19 years as a parent, I ask myself the same thing every year. Am I ready? What I’ve learned is that ‘ready’ is relative. What I know is that this community absolutely has what we need to show up and be present to support each other. Whether your family is navigating the grief of big changes or the stress associated with a typical school year, I hope the resources below help you cope. Please reach out by email, if you have questions or unique needs that require my support.

Take care,

Mrs Land

1."Kissing Hand Read Aloud" By relating to characters in the story, young children more easily understand the meaning of feelings and coping skills. Draw a heart 💙 on your child's hand before you leave the house to remind them that you are 'with' them all day.

2. Acknowledge your own level of anxiety privately and model a sense of confidence and calm to your child. Children sense your energy and they feed off of it. Depending on your child's age, talk about how you cope with anxiety. No one is perfect and by showing your children that you experience the same feelings they do, they notice healthy ways of coping.

3. We all fear the unexpected and change can be difficult. By preparing your child for what will happen, you can lessen their anxiety. Role-playing what going to school will look like can be helpful. Have younger kids (K/1) pick out stuffed animals or action figures to play different characters in their life (parents, siblings, teachers) and act out potential situations.

4. Instead of questioning, acknowledge their feelings by "saying what you see." For example, "Your eyes are looking away from me. You are quiet. I wonder if you are thinking about what school will be like." Let children express their fears and concerns, or allow for quiet time. If they don't share out loud, invite them to snuggle or listen to music and read together.

5. Wake up EARLY the morning of the first day. You may not be able to predict any hiccups that can occur, so give yourself extra time to ensure a calmer morning. Pro tip: bribes are helpful on that first day - a special treat or incentive may be all it takes. Mrs Land will be handing out 'MUSTANG MEGA-BUCKS' for anyone who gets in the Front Entry doors by 7:29AM!

6. Send your child to school with a family memento or ritual. It could be a family photo, a worry stone, a handwritten note they can keep in their pocket, or a little call-and-response you say to each other when you drop them off (Gallop away, Mustang! I'll stay all day, Orangutan!) They can easily use this if they get overwhelmed.

WHAT YOU NEED:

-string or yarn

-macaroni, tube pasta or beads

-markers

WHAT YOU DO:

1) Count how many family members you have in your home, include your pets!

2) Choose a bead or color a piece of pasta that represents each family member

3) Knot the yarn/string at the end by tying it around the first piece of pasta or bead. Lay the string on a flat surface while threading each piece on to the string.

4) Attach one end of the string on a backpack zipper or loop, then tie off the string in the same spot.

5) Know that your family is with you all day long at school!

Ask open-ended specific questions:

• “What did you do that was fun today?”
• “Did anything funny happen?”
• “What did you like best today?”
• “Did you do anything special with ________?”

If things didn't go as planned, just listen. Validate their feelings (eg. That sounds hard. Oh no. I'm

sorry that happened.) Ask if they want to talk about it more or talk about something else. If they do

want to keep talking, ask the 'magic question:' "If you could wave a magic wand and have a perfect

day tomorrow, what would it be like?" Tell them you hope tomorrow is a better day.