Counselor Corner
Trimester 2 - Issue 1
When should parents/guardians be concerned?
Some of the signs that mean a child may need further help from a mental health professional or health care provider include:
Less interested in school
Dropping grades
Does not show feelings
Difficulty making or keeping friends
Poor grades despite trying hard
Constant worry or anxiety
Persistent stomach aches or other body aches and pains
Refusal to go to school
Hyperactivity
Difficulty focusing
Low energy
Does not seem to be having fun
Loss of interest in usual activities
Sad for long periods of time
Irritable
Using drugs or alcohol
Sleeping less or more than usual
Frequent anger or acting out
Self Critical
When a child has more than one of these signs, the signs are intense and they last for more than several weeks, parents/guardians should be concerned.
What Should a Parent Do Next?
Talking with your child or teen is always a good idea to learn more about what is happening in their life such as stress or bullying. Parents/guardians should also discuss their concerns with a professional, some possible professionals to contact are:
- Your child’s pediatrician
Your child’s primary health care worker
Your child’s school counselor
8th: Ms. Goodier
7th: Ms. Bechard
6th: Ms. Kunert
ISD 196 Site-Based Mental Health Provider (contact counselors to get referred)
These professionals may give your child or teen a mental health screening to determine whether their symptoms may need follow up care.
Does teasing end when kids graduate from elementary school? Does it stop when they move on from middle to high school? Will it magically disappear when they become adults? Or is it sadly true that most of us will encounter bullies throughout our lifetimes?
Because we can’t ensure that the world will always be sweet and kind to our kids, common sense tells us that we ought to equip them with skills that allow them to cope with this sometimes less-than-considerate world.
Listed below are some basic principles that can help kids when they encounter teasing or bullying:
- Teach them that bullies get their power from our negative emotions. The more upset we get when picked on, the more powerful mean kids feel.
- Show your child how to trick bullies by pretending to be calm. If our children can learn to act calm when bullies hassle them, they become far less attractive targets.
- Teach your child to confuse or bewilder bullies by responding to verbal taunts with replies like, “Thanks for noticing” or “I appreciate the feedback.”
- Help your child develop great social skills so that they are liked, accepted, and protected by positive peers. Kids who don’t know how to relate in healthy ways often find themselves gravitating toward peers who treat them poorly.
Using these principles, parents can empower their kids to handle, and overcome, teasing and bullying. Instead of rescuing them, you can walk beside your kids as they move from the role of victim to victor.
(Reproduced from Love & Logic Insiders Club).
Love & Logic is a great parenting resource! It's one of our favorites. For more information from Dr. Charles Fay from Love & Logic visit: https://www.loveandlogic.com/
We all feel "stuck" at times in a cycle of negative thoughts - it's human nature! It turns out there is something you can do about it. It might sound way too simple, but it actually works. All you have to do is change how you think about things. Below is an example of a way a middle schooler (or even adult!) can get "unstuck" from a negative thought cycle...
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Imagine your thoughts are like different rooms in a big house. Sometimes, you might end up in a room that feels gloomy or upsetting, like a room full of dark clouds. When you're stuck in these negative thoughts, here are some things you can try:
Recognize the Negative Room: First, notice when you're in that gloomy room of negative thoughts. It's like realizing, "Oh, I'm in the room with dark clouds again."
Question Your Thoughts: Just because you're in that room doesn't mean those thoughts are true. Challenge them by asking yourself questions like, "Is this thought really true?" or "Is there another way to see this situation?"
Change Rooms: Try to leave that negative room. You can do this by thinking about something else you enjoy, like a hobby or a fun memory. It's like walking out of the gloomy room into one filled with sunlight.
Positive Room Decorating: Decorate your positive rooms! Fill them with happy thoughts or things you're grateful for. Maybe stick up pictures of good times or write down things that make you smile.
Talk to Someone: Sharing how you feel with a trusted adult, like a parent, teacher, or counselor, can help. They might help you find different ways to handle those negative thoughts.
Practice, Practice, Practice: Changing your thoughts might not happen overnight. Keep practicing, and it'll become easier to switch rooms from negative to positive thoughts.
Remember, just like a big house, your mind has many rooms. You can always choose which room to be in, even if it feels tough at times.
In last trimester's Counselor Corner, we wrote about Executive Function Skills. We are still talking about it regularly through out the school day at DHMS. Some parents have reached out to us for more support on this. Here is one resource that is coming up. Her name is Judy Bandy (used to be a middle school nurse) and she speaks, teaches, and consults on ADHD and Executive Function Resources - specifically to middle school students. She is also the original creator of our school's ADHD Learning Lab program. Click below for more info. And below that is the attached file for her parent classes coming up.
Need Food?
DHMS is partnered with Every Meal - Fighting Child Hunger to provide weekend meals to families in our school community. Every Meal provides a few non-perishable food items each week. It is free of cost to families and the bag of food will be placed in students backpacks for them to take home, every Thursday. Email your counselor if you would like to sign up.
Mental Health Help
DHMS students have access to therapy at school through the Associated Clinic of Psychology. ACP is our school-linked mental health service and is offered through a grant from The Children’s Mental Health Division of the MN Department of Human Services. These services are available for qualifying students with mental health concerns. For more information contact school counselors.