The Connection Corner
Your "Whole Child Hub"
Supporting or Enabling?
How do you know if you are helping your child — or limiting their growth by doing too much for them?
Supportive parents empower kids to be more independent. They work with their kids as they learn to overcome obstacles. Being supportive means acknowledging how your child is feeling, including difficult emotions. It also includes modeling healthy coping skills for managing challenging things, and providing structure and clear expectations.
Enabling, on the other hand, inadvertently reinforces undesired behavior. Being enabling includes letting your child avoid uncomfortable situations. All parents do this to some degree, to protect kids from pain and difficulty. But if kids are going to grow, they need to learn to take little risks. This boosts their confidence and makes them more independent.
Reflect:
Would my child describe me as being supportive or enabling?
Do I allow my child to learn from their mistakes?
Do I jump in and "save" my child from difficult situations?
Am I consistent with my expectations for my child?
*Are you interested in learning more from the Child Mind Institute? Check out their Parenting Guides on a multitude of topics.
Regulate, Relate, Reason...in that order! A Deep Dive Into Emotional Regulation
Join Dr. Doug Bolton for a special parent/guardian session this November 19th!
Session Title: Supporting Our Children In Their Hardest Moments: A Deep Dive Into Emotional Regulation
When: NOVEMBER 19, 2024
Time: 7:00 PM - 8:00 PM
Format: In-Person @ Townline (This event will also be livestreamed and recorded if you cannot make it in person!)
Have you ever tried to reason with a child who is not regulated?
It probably did not go as well as you would have wished. Why? When children are in their "emotional brain", they are not able to reason and think clearly.
Adults need to first ensure our children are regulated before we can reason with them.
Remember, dysregulated children NEED regulated adults.
Here are some tips to regulate yourself before you attempt to reason with a child who may be upset:
1. The 3-Second Rule
Before reacting, count to three. This simple pause gives you time to cool down and respond thoughtfully instead of impulsively.
2. Breathe In, Breathe Out
Feel your blood pressure rising? Take a few deep breaths. Try the 4-7-8 method:
- Inhale for 4 seconds,
- Hold for 7 seconds,
- Exhale for 8 seconds.
This calms your nerves, hacks the brain and changes the energy in your body and in the room.
3. Focus on What You Can Control
You can’t fix everything. Focus on what you can control—your words, actions, and mindset.
4. Help your child name their feeling
Say, "I can see you are frustrated. Do you need a minute to calm down, or do you want to talk about it calmly now?" Modeling calmness and simple language can help your child when they lose their "cool" next time.
Supportive Parenting of Anxious Childhood Emotions: Parent/Guardian Event
Do you have an anxious child?
Hilary Davis of Touchstone Therapy in Vernon Hills presented a virtual "Lunch and Learn" on Tuesday, October 22nd around the evidence-based 'SPACE' Program for parenting children with anxiety.
This session already happened! Did you miss it?
Click here to watch the recording!
When a child does not outgrow the fears and worries that are typical in young children, or when there are so many fears and worries that they interfere with school, home, or play activities, the child may be diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. Anxiety is not one disorder but rather a category of conditions.
Anxiety may present as fear or worry but can also make children irritable and angry. Anxiety symptoms can also include trouble sleeping, as well as physical symptoms like fatigue, headaches, or stomachaches. Some anxious children keep their worries to themselves and, thus, the symptoms can be missed.
(CDC.gov)
For more resources, go to:
- Anxiety and Children - American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry (AACAP) fact sheet
- If you need help finding support, click here for the District 73 Social-Emotional Support Resource List.
- For more information about the SPACE Treatment Program, visit this link.
Middle School Staff Participates in Advisory Training
Middle school staff participated in a training session with consultants from SEL Integrations during Institute Day around best practices for implementing our newly updated Advisory period. This training included information about the role of an advisor, how to implement community circles effectively, the purpose of advisory, and more. Additionally, staff continue to participate in professional development and co-planning with our consultants from SEL Integrations throughout the fall to ensure full implementation of high-quality advisory lessons for all students.
Simply Bee 🐝 5th Grade SEL Workshop Focuses on Becoming Aware of our Emotions
Hawthorn has partnered with Simply Bee Counseling for the past 3 school years to provide a workshop for all 5th graders across the district focused on Becoming Aware of the "Big 4" - Thoughts, Emotions, Physical Sensations, and Urges". This is part of the Growth and Resiliency Model that was created by Simply Bee CEO, Audrey Grunst.
Vernon Hills High School SPARK Club Spreads Kindness at HSYL
The Vernon Hills High School SPARK (Supporting Peers and Reaching Kids) Club designed "Kindness Rocks" and delivered them to our kindergarteners at Hawthorn School for Young Learners! Thank you to VHHS for spreading kindness to our youngest learners!
SAEBRS/mySAEBRS Benchmark Screener
Hawthorn School District 73 focuses on the growth and learning of the whole child. This includes programming that supports students’ social and emotional well-being. One way we help ensure that students’ needs are being met is by participating in benchmark assessments for social-emotional learning three times each year using the SAEBRS/MySAEBRS screening tool.
Kindergarten - Grade 5: Please click here to access information regarding our fall social-emotional screening.
Grades 6 - 8: Please click here to access information regarding our fall social-emotional screening.
ReferralGPS: Connecting Families to Mental Health Resources
- Searchable Database: Offers a database of treatment options for easy access.
- Care Navigation: Provides services to support families in triage, appointment scheduling, and follow-up care.
- Inclusive Insurance Coverage: The service is compatible with all types of private and public insurance, including PPO, HMO, Medicaid, and it caters to uninsured or underinsured families.
- No-Cost Access: Available free of charge for use by district students, staff, and families.
- Confidentiality Assured: Rest assured that all information entered into the ReferralGPS tool is kept completely confidential and securely stored.
The Connection Corner Archives
Social Workers
Our students benefit from access to school social work services. Our social workers provide ongoing support in several ways. They collaborate regularly with grade-level teams to promote a positive school climate for all students, and help support staff in using instructional practices that support social-emotional learning across all subjects. Our social workers may also lead class lessons or work in small groups with students to provide more targeted support.
District Social Workers:
Meghan Frazier - Lincoln School - frazierm@hawthorn73.org
Rhonda Malina - Hawthorn School for Young Learners - malinar@hawthorn73.org
Shelby Behrens - Elementary North/Aspen - behrenss@hawthorn73.org
Anna Bach - Aspen -bacha@hawthorn73.org
Ashley Zarinana - Dual Language - zarinanaa@hawthorn73.org
Kathleen Falotico - Townline - faloticok@hawthorn73.org
Paul Mazzetta - Elementary North - mazzettap@hawthorn73.org
Connie Travis - Elementary North - travisc@hawthorn73.org
Nesrin Unlu - Elementary South - unlun@hawthorn73.org
Brittany Langton - Elementary South - langtonb@hawthorn73.org
Lauren Brownstein - Middle School South - brownsteinl@hawthorn73.org
Amunn Jaffery - Middle School South - jafferya@hawthorn73.org
Jaime Medbery - Middle School South - medberyj@hawthorn73.org
Brian Van - Middle School North - vanb@hawthorn73.org
Kelli Cordes - Middle School North - cordesk@hawthorn73.org
Scarlett Davalos - Middle School North - davaloss@hawthorn73.org
Alexi Viviano - Elementary South - vivianoa@hawthorn73.org
Connect with ME!
Megan Goldman
Social, Emotional, Behavioral Coordinator
847-990-4269
Follow me on X (formerly known as Twitter) @D73SOARS
Check out my YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCj-L3MVWzHT7xxgWytCWmYA