JOSH MILLER
The Principal Chronicles continue ...
The Groundhog saw his shadow on Monday, which means we are going to have six more weeks of winter. Having said that, I guess winter looks like high 50's and sunny, so that doesn't sound too bad. For those who are unfamiliar with Groundhog Day: Puxatawny Phil is a real live groundhog who lives in Gobbler's Knob in Puxatawny, Pennsylvania. Each year on February 2nd, they pull his rather large body out of his hole and watch if he sees his shadow. If he does, 6 more weeks of winter; if not, then spring is right around the corner. I have no idea how accurate this is, but it is a fun tradition, and they have a really good movie about it called (shockingly enough) Groundhog Day.
On the home front, it was my birthday on Monday. I really, really don't like my birthday. It is a ton of attention, and it makes me feel really uncomfortable to have so much on me. So on Monday, I took a day off and went to Fort Collins to spend the day with my one and only. She told me she wanted to "take me out" for my birthday, which is kind of funny since she has zero dollars in her bank account. So instead of going to school, I drove up to Fort Collins. First thing I did was walk around her dorm with her to talk to all of her friends. We stopped by her sorority and met all of her "sisters". From there, we went and picked up my parents to go to lunch. I thought the restaurant my daughter picked was a nice sit-down place for my 80-year-old parents to enjoy a meal, but instead it was a typical, gross, college eatery, complete with a walk-up menu, a full bar, and a bar full of people having some beverages at noon on a Monday. The food that my daughter thought would be appropriate? Yep, sliders. She actually thought that my 80-year-old parents would love to eat gross college bar sliders for my birthday. So there we sat, my mom constantly trying to hear over the noise of the poor drink choice patrons and the pounding of the techno music blaring over the speakers, all while trying to choke down greasy sliders with a side of fries, which looked like they were cooked in the Bog of Eternal Stench.
After lunch, my daughter felt as though we hadn't had enough greasy food, so we needed to go get ice cream. Luckily for us, the place she picked actually had decent ice cream. From there, we dropped my parents off at home so they could pass out and try to digest the slider bombs they just consumed. I'm pretty confident one of the two of them had some TUMS later that night. We then drove back to campus so my daughter could show me her new classes for the second semester. We walked all over campus, which was a good thing as I needed to burn off a quarter of a million calories from lunch. It was also nice to see that things hadn't changed that much since I was in college. Most of the classes were filled with partially awake students with their computers out. Back in my day, we had to write on stone tablets or scrolls, but other than that, it was about the same.
By then,n it was time for me to head home. Lucky for me, I was able to spend an additional hour in my car in rush hour traffic on my way home. Overall, it was a pretty decent birthday, and all it cost me was $85, plus $50 in gas, plus whatever surgery I am going to need after my newly clogged artery explodes from the slider I ate at lunch. Happy Birthday to me.
That is it for this week's episode. Stay tuned for next week when the Principal Chronicles continue.
