I want to take a moment to acknowledge what so many of us are feeling—stress, exhaustion, and at times, frustration. The work we do is deeply meaningful, but it is also relentless. The weight of responsibility, the pressure of expectations, and the emotional toll of supporting our students can be overwhelming. And I know that, at times, school administrators can feel like another burden rather than a source of support. I hear that. I feel that.
Over the past few weeks, I have been grappling with my own sense of loss, stress, and fatigue. As many of you know, I recently lost my mother, and the grief has been heavy. In the midst of this heaviness, I was invited to attended a socio-emotional wellness retreat for NYCPS principals called Courageous Leadership. It was a space to reflect, to pause, and to acknowledge the toll that constant movement, problem-solving, and caretaking can take on us as leaders, educators, and human beings.
One of the most powerful takeaways from this experience was the importance of giving ourselves permission to pause—to sit with our stress, our frustration, our fear. To recognize what we have to carry and what we may be carrying simply because we don’t know how to put it down. I was reminded that vulnerability is not weakness; it is power. It is courage. It is the ability to say:
- I need a moment to process.
- I don’t have the answer, but I will work to find it.
- I need help.
- I need to take something off my plate.
We often encourage our students to ask for what they need, to be honest about their struggles, and to embrace who they are. But do we allow the same for ourselves? Do we give each other, and ourselves, the grace to be human—to be overwhelmed, to struggle, to not have it all together? We must. Because kindness, empathy, and understanding begin with how we treat ourselves.
Viktor Frankl wrote, "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom."
I want us to find that space—together. Let’s commit to offering one another patience and understanding, to normalizing the need for rest and reflection, and to making room for our whole selves in this work. We are complicated, brilliant, damaged, amazing people. And our students, our families, and our colleagues deserve the best of us—not the most exhausted version of us.
So let’s remind each other, whenever we need it: Take a moment. Take a breath. Find your space.
With love,
Courtney
